I've taken my life for granted so many times before.
I, along with many others as I would like to think, never really take into account how blessed we really are to live (all the while ghetto) in a safe, somewhat secure house, with running water and electricity. That I have a double bed all to myself with soft, warm pillows, throws and teddies. I am working in retail at minimum wage and while I hate it, I know it is just so much better than Asian babies slaving hard over all your fake Louis Vuitton bags. I have hundreds of pieces of clothing, some of those I haven't even worn yet. I have the opportunity to breeze into a University Pathway because of my stubbornness of not committing through Years 11 & 12 which I realise now were too easy because of 1) teachers and the staff seriously gave me so much slack, and 2) all I had to do was rock up to school, sit there and listen, write some shit down, and go home. Yes, I do regret leaving school, but I know that during that time, even sometime before I was what I think as depressed. I never wanted to get out of bed, and on those solemn days I did get up and go to school for a full day, I never wanted to come back home. I considered suicide more than once. I always used to and to this very day still think that moving far away and just starting fresh would help so much. I could forget about all those mistakes I've made and friends I've put so much of a burden on that I seriously wonder what they could possibly see in someone like myself to make them stay around.
My Mother Dearest basically grew up an orphan. Her Mother died when she was 9 months old, and her Father died when she was 8 or 9. I couldn't even begin to fathom life without my parents in it. Nobody to guide me, support me, and pick me up when I'm at my lowest, or at the Train Station.
I have been trying so hard to not take my life for granted, but it really is harder said than done.
So let us celebrate today! The life we have could be gone and forgotten tomorrow.
Love Love,
Jessica.
xo ♥
I now leave you with just a few of my Life in Pictures Shit.
I, along with many others as I would like to think, never really take into account how blessed we really are to live (all the while ghetto) in a safe, somewhat secure house, with running water and electricity. That I have a double bed all to myself with soft, warm pillows, throws and teddies. I am working in retail at minimum wage and while I hate it, I know it is just so much better than Asian babies slaving hard over all your fake Louis Vuitton bags. I have hundreds of pieces of clothing, some of those I haven't even worn yet. I have the opportunity to breeze into a University Pathway because of my stubbornness of not committing through Years 11 & 12 which I realise now were too easy because of 1) teachers and the staff seriously gave me so much slack, and 2) all I had to do was rock up to school, sit there and listen, write some shit down, and go home. Yes, I do regret leaving school, but I know that during that time, even sometime before I was what I think as depressed. I never wanted to get out of bed, and on those solemn days I did get up and go to school for a full day, I never wanted to come back home. I considered suicide more than once. I always used to and to this very day still think that moving far away and just starting fresh would help so much. I could forget about all those mistakes I've made and friends I've put so much of a burden on that I seriously wonder what they could possibly see in someone like myself to make them stay around.
My Mother Dearest basically grew up an orphan. Her Mother died when she was 9 months old, and her Father died when she was 8 or 9. I couldn't even begin to fathom life without my parents in it. Nobody to guide me, support me, and pick me up when I'm at my lowest, or at the Train Station.
I have been trying so hard to not take my life for granted, but it really is harder said than done.
So let us celebrate today! The life we have could be gone and forgotten tomorrow.
Love Love,
Jessica.
xo ♥
I now leave you with just a few of my Life in Pictures Shit.
this girl right here, she's a class of her own. it's been 4 years worth of
crazy fall outs and "reunions" but i am proud to say she is one of my besties.
We have had our fair share of crazy times. She brings out the best of the worst
in me but I have to admit that I love it.
I'll be flying out to Bali with this bitch at the end of the month
(that is if I get my passport on time!), and oh the adventures we will have!
In the next few post I will show you some more of my beautiful bitches,
and go waaaaay more in depth just cause they deserve it.
